Stacey and I had a blast creating our Perfect Summer
Playlist during this week’s podcast. Admittedly, we spend most of our time on
the show talking about movies and TV, so we were itching to talk about pop music
and this seemed like a perfect time to do it.
It occurred to me about five or six years ago that “summer
music,” like holiday music (aka Christmas Carols) was a thing. But just as the
B-52’s remind us that summer has a taste (specifically, “orange popsicles and
lemonade”), I’ve become convinced that summer has a sound – or more accurately,
lots of sounds … but sounds that particularly belong to this sunny season.
SONGS ABOUT SUMMER (duh)
The obvious place to start is songs that specifically
reference summer, or where the word “summer” is right in the title. Other
tunes, like Sheryl Crow’s “Soak Up the Sun” don’t quite sound right when the
tulips are just beginning to pop in April or when the leaves are falling in
mid-October, but couldn’t sound more perfect on a hot, July day.
SONGS ABOUT WARM PLACES
“The Whole Wide World” by Wreckless Eric is a favorite
summer tune of mine, probably because the first verse casually name drops both
the Bahamas and Tahiti. Any song called “California Girls,” whether sung by the
Beach Boys or Katy Perry (featuring Snoop Dogg) is bound to sound a little
summery. I’m not sure where the Mermaid Café in Joni Mitchell’s “Carey” is
supposed to be, but it’s close enough to Africa to get a hot wind, and close
enough to the sea to put beach tar on Joni’s feet; it’s a classic summer tune. And
even though the band is practically synonymous with Ireland, U2’s “Where TheStreets Have No Name” is so evocative of a hot desert landscape that it seems
right at home on a summer playlist. “California Dreamin’” by the Mamas and the
Papas is pointedly about a winter’s day, and yet it just sounds like summer.
REGGAE
The syncopated counterpoint to a bass and drum downbeat is
really all it takes to send a listener on a direct route to Jamaica, home of
Bob Marley, Peter Tosh, and Jimmy Cliff. The lyrics can be about injustice,
intoxicants, or three little birds pitched by my doorstep – it’s bound to sound
just like sunshine and a sandy beach. On the show, I picked a song by Ziggy
Marley and the Melody Makers, comprised of four of Bob & Rita Marley’s
children – and I like them so much, here’s another one.
LATIN MUSIC
Like reggae, songs either sung in Spanish or featuring a delicate Latin guitar can transport a listener
to another land, and to a white kid from the Pacific Northwest, it often feels like the musical equivalent of a frozen
margarita. My favorite new song of the summer is “Despacito,” by Luis Fonsi
(featuring Daddy Yankee, not featuring Justin Bieber). In it, Fonsi sings, “Despacito/Vamo
a hacerlo en una playa en Puerto Rico/Hasta que las olas griten "¡Ay,
Bendito!" … which is basically an invitation to get down and dirty with
Fonsi on a beach in Puerto Rico until you scream to a higher power. Yeah, I’m
just going to let you ponder that for a while ... (translation: hold on a minute; Eric has the vapors).
Music has a strange ability to attach itself to memories in
a powerful way. So the perfect soundtrack for your summer, no matter what
Stacey and I tell you, are the songs that take you back to the summers you
remember, particularly the ones that remind you of long summer vacations, for
those of us lucky enough to have enjoyed those. As a child of the 80’s, that can sound like a little Toto, a little Joan Jett, a lot of Madonna, and maybe a splash of Def Leppard.
To listen to POPeration!’s “Perfect Summer Playlist,” go to
Spotify or iTunes, fire up the grill, mix up some Piña Colada’s and think of
us. And in the meantime, don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review. See you next week!
Tiniest bloglet ever, but we said we'd share the playlist we put together via our blog. It's on Spotify here, and it's on iTunes here. If you're on Google Play, go here. And to listen to the show itself, ABOUT these songs and why we chose them ... here you go:
Don't forget to subscribe wherever you download your podcasts, and we'd love you if you took a minute to rate and review us while you're there. A longer blog drops on Thursday, as per usual. Watch this space!
by Stacey Fearheiley So, never to leave a dead horse unkicked*, Eric and I had a little discussion "offline" about the Wonder Woman film after I had a chance to see it and I thought I'd share a few of our takeaways.
So much controversy, so little reason?
Eric: I say "Get over it." All the complaining about this film
not being “feminist enough” is just evidence, to me, that we only have one
female-led superhero movie that was a hit IN THE HISTORY OF FILM. Let’s just enjoy
the fact that this was a hit, and hope that this means more superheroine women
will follow, and maybe those movies to come will be everything you want them to
be. I could say a lot more, but our friend Stefani actually wrote a great essay
about the whole thing, so I’ll just point people there.
Stacey: I agree to a certain extent. I think that it is a really good movie. I think it is the best DC Comics movie so far. I loved Gal Gadot. Thought the casting was great. BUT. I think putting this movie forward as the End-All/Be -All for women directed/led films isn't fair to it. It is an action flick, plain and simple, where the lead happens to be female. I want more of them, but to throw this up as the best and greatest isn't fair. No movie can be all things to all people. I think the expectations were unfair, whether you believe WW met them or not. What about Chris Pine as the "heroine"? Stacey: I could watch Chris Pine dial a phone. He can do anything he wants and I will watch. Here's where I am....he's the love interest of the lead. Since the lead is a straight female, the love interest should be a male. He is...and he's lovely. Not only that, he is a good actor and his comic timing is perfect. Everything you want in the hero's romantic lead.
Eric: YES!! Chris Pine is so good in this movie. He probably gets to see
more action than most of the Lois Lanes and Pepper Potts – the girls who hang
out alongside male superheroes. But to my mind, that’s the fault of those other
movies. He looks great, he’s really funny, and is a terrific foil for the very
earnest Diana. Some favorite moments? Eric: I loved how subversive this movie is. There’s a whole
“shopping sequence” that – on its face – was taken right out of any rom-com
where the heroine needs a perfect dress to make all her dreams come true. In
this one, she tries on outfit after outfit and is dismayed by them all. Not
because they’re not pretty enough, but because she can’t fight in them. Because
it’s a funny moment, the social commentary is subtle, but if you’re looking for
it, boy it’s there – all about the way that women are literally restrained by
societal convention in a container to make them docile, subservient, and unable
to bend over, much less go into battle.
I also loved the moment – a tiny, tiny moment – when Diana
sees her first baby, and is immediately drawn to this infant, only to be
deterred by Steve Trevor. It’s a telling moment, and awfully girly, but it
doesn’t diminish her bad-ass self one bit. She can be girly, and she can kick
ass, and both of those things can co-exist.
Stacey: I totally loved the "baby" scene. I felt it rounded her out a bit. She'd never seen one, only read about them...and there was a live one right in front of her. It was female, but also just human.
One of my truly favorite parts was pure action. When she steps out of the foxhole into No Man's Land, with her shield up and bullets bouncing all around and still she pushes on. We've seen boys do this in TONS of movies since the beginning of time. To see her do it with the guys behind her, kind of shrugging and then following....really fun. Had a smile on my face the whole time.
Thoughts on the supporting characters?
Stacey: One thing I absolutely loved was the fact that when she finally gets her gang of misfit fighters together, there isn't this long drawn out conflict of "should we really be following a woman? Is she really suited for leading us?" etc. etc. Once they see her do her stuff...literally, ONCE, they're on board with it. Done. She the boss. Let's go. It was so refreshing.
Of course the show stealer/stopper and character there wasn't nearly enough of was...
Eric: Etta Candy!! She’s barely in the film, but I just adored Lucy
Davis in this role. Because of the World War I setting of this film, she likely
won’t be back for the sequel, which will probably step forward in time by at
least a few decades – but she’ll be missed. Aside from the horrible “Dr.
Poison,” there weren’t many other female characters of note once we left
Paradise Island – and even though Etta is not an Amazon, she’s witty and a bit
brazen, completely committed to her cause of helping the Allies defeat the bad
guys, and – if you blinked, you probably missed it – a suffragette.
Stacey: Here's my dream: That in subsequent films with WW as lead, they go back in time and connect the modern story with history some how and we see Etta as Diana's secretary and are able to have fun with that relationship as Etta teaches Diana how the world works, etc. That's my dream.
Downsides/ Disappointments of the movie?
Eric: Could we not have found a way to include Lynda Carter in a
tiny guest spot? As Diana first gets to London, perhaps a gaggle of
suffragettes in white being led by Lynda? It would have made the audience
cheer, and I bet she would have done it. Oh well, you can still catch her on
the CW’s Supergirl as yes, the
President of the United States.
Stacey: Leave it to you, fanboy, to find a way to get Supergirl into a conversation about Wonder Woman!
For me, I could do without the higher heel on her boots when fighting for right, truth and the democratic way against Nazis. I also, sorry actor who played the main villain (trying not to spoil it for those who haven't seen the movie yet), would have liked a stronger foe. Disappointed in who Ares turned out to be and the actor who portrayed that god.
Final thoughts on Wonder Woman, the movie...
Eric: I think it is definitely a feminist movie. No argument. I love the fact that throughout the entire film, men keep
telling her to either stay put or stay quiet, and she never obeys.
Stacey: I concur. Feminist in the truest way. She was equal (sometimes MORE than equal) to any man she met. Should this be the big FEMINIST BEACON of HOLLYWOOD? No. I don't think so. But, I reiterate that I loved that after initial skepticism, once she proved that she could play the game like the boys, the boys accepted it and moved on. (Sometimes this was not historically accurate...but I don't care.)
Yes, loved too that she never "did as she was told." She considered other ideas, evaluated the situation, made her own decision and did what she wanted. She kept on going.
Eric: Nevertheless, she persisted.
*No actual horses were harmed in the writing of this blog.
LGBTQ. It's a mouthful. It's the worst stack of letters you could have in a Scrabble game. And it's everywhere! What's it stand for? Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trangender and Queer.
I bring this up because 1. it's the end of Pride Month. and B. POPeration! this week was about the representation of the "T" portion in movies and television. Our guest, Allyson Robinson, herself a transwoman, discussed how it felt to see some of the portrayals of trans people in media. It wasn't all good. But it was informative.
As a white, straight, cisgender woman, I can get all uppity about how women are portrayed in movies and tv. I'll get up in your grill about how "paternalistic" everything is and how there needs to be more women EVERYWHERE in film and tv.
I'll whine about how sometimes male writers who write women's roles don't write them believably. "A woman would NOT say that in that situation. No girl wants that." Stuff like that. That is because I am as I described. That is my experience.
Unless it's brought to my attention, I don't see the other inequalities out there. Is it just me, or my generation, or being human? Dunno. Not gonna answer that question here. But, NOW, the trans person issues have been brought to my attention with this week's podcast. And as they say..."once you wake that bear...."
We all have lists of good and bad representations of people like ourselves...and Allyson is no different. She has some opinions! We asked her to name some good and bad concepts of the trans community. So she did. And I was surprised by some.
Let's go over a few, shall we?
Liked:
Transparent.
Duh. It's brilliant. At least I thought so....now I don't feel guilty watching it.
OITNB
If you haven't found this one, you're not paying attention.
The OA.
Sense8.
So many people upset about the cancellation of this one. UPDATE: Netflix will air a 2-hour finale. http://bit.ly/2sWdFhd
Boys Don't Cry.
Groundbreaking in that it was so highly visible.
TransAmerica
Honorable mention per Allyson: All About My Mother and Penny Dreadful.
But it wouldn't be as much fun if we didn't have the DISLIKED list. Here goes:
Crying Game
Was the audience supposed to feel sorry for the guy in love?
Dressed to Kill
Fun fact about this trailer...if you watch it, you've seen the whole plot. (the 80's were great.)
Dallas Buyers Club
Allyson purposely didn't watch this one. It goes here on principle.
Hit and Miss
Post podcast research: This was a 6 part British mini series. They did try to air it in the U.S. but didn't get the traction, so only 1 episode appeared. Probably for the best.
Honorable mention for those that don't make the "Pro Trans" cut: Danish Girl (Allyson didn't see this, but avoided it on purpose. yes, I was surprised too.) and Basic Instinct (not really surprised at all).
So, what's my point? My point is actually pretty simple. 1. Don't be afraid of the acronyms. LGBTQ is just about inclusion (even though the vowels are probably feeling a bit dissed.) and B. Don't assume that because a show or movie or book or article or blog is ABOUT something that it is also TRUE to that something. Want to know more? Meet some people...talk to them...ask them questions. Find the real answers. Now I've brought it to YOUR attention.
Our society is ever changing and hopefully ever learning about differences, and about accepting and loving those differences.
To quote this guy I once saw in something, " Love is love is love is love...."*
For those who listened to this week's show, here are some of the moments we mentioned in our conversation. Grab your tissues.
From Terms of Endearment, here's that moment when Debra Winger says goodbye to her sons on her deathbed. Don't say we didn't warn you.
Here's the reunion scene at the end of The Color Purple that never fails to make Eric blubber. Whoopi doesn't say a word, but her reactions are enough to draw tears from a stone.
This is the final scene in David Tennant's run of Doctor Who, which turned Stacey into a blubbering mess.
Here's the moment in The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, when Will regains, then just as quickly loses his relationship with his father.
And here's a scene from the saddest episode ever of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, when Buffy is forced to tell her young sister Dawn that their mother is dead -- featuring Sarah Michelle Gellar and Michelle Trachtenberg at their very best.
And finally, here's that Land Rover commercial that turned Stacey into a quivering mass of hormones during her first pregnancy. But honestly, can you blame her?
If you're still functioning, don't forget to hit the "Subscribe" button wherever you listen to podcasts, or maybe stroll on over to iTunes and give us a review. Every little bit of feedback helps. Thanks for listening.
There’s a great scene in Blake Edwards’ Victor/Victoria between Robert Preston and Julie Andrews. She’s at
the end of her rope, both financially and emotionally, and is sobbing
uncontrollably in his arms. “There have been times I’d have given my soul to
cry like that,” he says. She whimpers back, “I hate it.” He smiles, pats her
back, and replies, “You wouldn’t if you couldn’t do it anymore.”
There’s something about crying that presents a puzzle to
anyone who studies popular culture, even as a hobby, and it is this: We tend to
avoid crying in life, or at least those situations that would call forth tears.
And yet, some people don’t mind, even seek out, movies or television shows that
cause them to weep in response to fictional characters and situations.
In a completely unscientific bit of research earlier this
week, I asked my community of Facebook friends to weigh in on the movies that
never failed to make them cry, and I learned a few things – about my friends,
mostly … but also about me, and why we go to the movies, period.
Several of my friends named movies they had initially seen as children. Bambi was, of course, mentioned, as well as It’s a Wonderful Life and Old
Yeller, which my friend Fay goes so far as to label “abusive.” An example
mentioned several times by several friends was Disney’s classic Dumbo. In particular, the moment where
Dumbo’s mother, caged and branded a “mad elephant” because she wouldn’t
tolerate cruelty toward her beloved child, reaching her trunk through the bars
of her cage, and cradling little Dumbo in her trunk to the strains of “Baby
Mine” was a significant source of trauma for many of my friends. As my friend
Ellen noted, “She
every mother trying to protect her son from all the hurt in the world and it
can't be done.”
In fact, lots of people mentioned mothers. Like Stacey, Terms of Endearment was an immediate
pick for my friend Franc, for a very particular reason. “I watched it … with my
mother. My sister died from cancer and viewing this movie with Mom, still so
lost in her grief at the time, just gutted me. Anytime I have ever watched it
since, I can't separate that memory and sense of loss from the film.”
Any kind of mother seemed to elicit tears, even the gorilla
mother of a human child. My friend Dennis noted that “when [Tarzan’s] mother sings, ‘You’ll Be In My
Heart’ … my daughter just gets the tissues out for me.”
And of course, there’s Steel
Magnolias. I told my own story in this week’s episode, but my friend Kathy
sees that final scene in the cemetery from a slightly different perspective
than I. “No
parent can watch that scene without tears,” she says, “seeing Sally Fields try
to grapple with her daughter's death.”
My friend Kyle had a pick I wasn’t expecting. “As a kid, it was a VHS
we had of Danielle Steele's Fine Things.
It made me cry every time, mostly because it always made me think of what it
would be like if I were to lose my mom.”
And the dads got to join the party, too. My friend Brent
(who just happens to write the best dad-blog
ever) mentioned Finding Nemo,
particularly the scene “at the end, where Marlin realizes he has to let Nemo grow up and
experience life on his own. As a dad, I'm so not ready for that [talk].”
And my friend Steve had a similar reaction at the end of Field of Dreams. “The last scene when his father says, ‘want to have a catch?’ … I
start peeling onions.” My friend Leticia picked The Little Princess. “especially when she sees her father after being told that he's
dead and he doesn't remember her! And then when they are finally reunited!”
(She was clearly crying as she typed this.)
Familial bonds aside, stories about friendship were
mentioned a lot. Beaches was a
popular pick, as was Babette’s Feast.
There were also some surprises in this category. My friend Erick remembers a
scene from the end of Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (and no, he
wasn’t crying from sheer exhaustion, as I was). He notes, “when Sam says to Frodo
on Mt. Doom, ‘I may not be able to carry the ring for you, but I can carry
you,’ and hefts him up and climbs. What a heroic gesture, what an amazing
friend, what an amazing bond between them.”
And then there’s my friend Jeb, who teared up at the end of Guardians of the Galaxy, of all things.
“Remember when
the ship was crashing and Groot decided to weave his tree-like body around the
group as a last-ditch biological protection? Rocket starts crying and asking
Groot, his ONLY friend, ‘Why are you doing this? You'll die!’ Groot gazes into
his eyes and simply says... ‘We are Groot.’ … That physical embrace and
emotional union is something I cherish whenever I can find it with friends in
my life, probably because I grew up in a culture that taught men not to be
affectionate and not to say what is really in their hearts.”
It might not surprise regular listeners to learn that there
are a lot of gay men in my Facebook feed, and some of the choices reflected
that as well. Latter Days, a film
I’ve actually not seen, was mentioned by several friends. Jon wrote, “I really related to it
and felt really lucky that I was never tortured at one of those conversion
places. Never fails to get me when they are putting him in the ice bath and
dunking his head under.” As pleasant as that sounds, I think I do need
to see this film, given the sheer number of mentions it received.
Other LGBT films mentioned were Brokeback Mountain, Boys
Don’t Cry, Freeheld, Longtime Companion, Philadelphia, and several votes for It’s My Party. “[I cry] for so many different reasons,” wrote my friend Eric. “The
"what ifs: What if they hadn't broken up? What if they'd gotten back
together sooner? The love story is so heartbreaking.”
Finally, there were some political choices. “When Yvonne
starts singing the Marseillaise [in Casablanca]
and the tears run down her face, I'm right there with her,” wrote my friend
Katherine.
And my friend Dan remembered the scene in Schindler’s List, “where Schindler looks at his Nazi pin and says ‘How
many more could this have gotten?’” At the movies as in life, the political is often personal, too.
I admit that I had a similar experience recently, watching
the national tour of The Sound of Music
at Washington DC’s Kennedy Center. When the Captain got choked up halfway
through “Edelweiss,” he was singing at the Kaltzberg Music Festival in front of
four enormous swastikas, I could feel hot tears streaming down my face. And I
wondered if I had seen this same show last year, if I would have cried.
(Probably, but I did wonder.)
Other tear-inducing films that weren’t mentioned above
include Avalon, A Beautiful Mind, Beauty
& the Beast (2017), Big, Brian’s Song, Broadway Danny Rose, A
Christmas Carol (1951), The Champ,
Cinema Paradiso, Cooley High, The Deer Hunter,
A Dog’s Purpose, Empire of the Sun, The
English Patient, Ever After: A
Cinderella Story, The Fault in Our
Stars, Forrest Gump, Fried Green Tomatoes, Fur, Ghost,
Greyfriars Bobby: The True Story of a Dog,
Harold & Maude, Heartburn, The Hollars, How to Train
Your Dragon, The Ice Storm, Imitation of Life (1959), Inside Out, Lawrence of Arabia, Life is
Beautiful, Little Women (1933), Love Actually, Love Story, Madame X, Me Before You, Moana, Mulan, The Notebook, Pretty Woman,
Pride & Prejudice, Rudy, A Star is Born (1954), Stepmom,
Toy Story 3, The Trip to Bountiful, W;t,
and The Wizard of Oz. That’s a lot of
Kleenex, right there.
Sometimes we cry about things that are sad. A parent or a
child (or worse yet, a dog) dies, lovers are parted, people are lonely. Sometimes
we cry because the joy we feel witnessing a long overdue reunion or the birth
of a child is so overwhelming that we start to leak. Sometimes we cry because
people – or hobbits – are wonderful and capable of so much good that it makes
our hearts swell.
But in every case, I believe, we’re not really crying at
hobbits, or clownfish, or a broke Buildings & Loans manager at
Christmastime, or a girl from Kansas lost on the Yellow Brick Road. We’re
crying because we see something of ourselves up there. It’s probably not a
coincidence that everyone in my Facebook thread who mentioned Latter Days was at one point in their
lives a young gay man afraid to come out, or that everyone who mentioned Beaches was a woman who could tell me a
story about her very best friend that she’s known for years. Crying at the
movies is basically the same thing as looking at yourself square in the mirror
and telling yourself that it’s going to be okay … or that it’s already better
than okay … or maybe just that you’re not alone in the world. (Or that if the
Von Trapps could smuggle seven kids over the Swiss Alps, we’ll survive Donald
Trump.)
I believe that we throw ourselves up there on the silver
screen whether we’re watching an action movie, a silly comedy, or a maudlin
tearjerker. That’s why we’re willing to give two hours of our lives to people
and situations that don’t even exist. When a movie is just okay, it lets us get
away from ourselves for a little while, but when a movie is fantastic – or just
the right movie at the right time – it allows us to find ourselves.
Parenting isn't easy. Being a mom is hard. Being a dad....is just confusing. In many ways, Dads get the fuzzy end of the lollipop.
Mother's Day came first. "Mommy" or "Mama" is often the first word from baby. And when there's a boo boo, it's Mommy one runs to for assistance.
Even in the movies, as in Steven Spielberg's Hook, Peter Pan's daughter tells Captain Hook that he needs " a mother very very badly."
In this week's podcast Eric and I talk about our favorite movie and tv dads. Peter Pan didn't make the list. Peter Pan, in that movie, was not a very good dad. Even in some of the films or tv shows where the dads made the cut, Father of the Bride and the Dick Van Dyke Show for example, the dads provide for the family monetarily, but for the heavy emotional lifting of the family or the "getting stuff done with the kids" portion....that was Mom. And while I will admit again that I equated Dick Van Dyke with my own Dad often, the emotionally distant, workaholic, remote father figure was NOT my experience.
Fun story: Steve Martin's Father of the Bride and Hook came out the same year, 1991. My dad, Don, and I went to see both of them that summer together. At the end of both movies our cheeks were moist from tears. During FotB, I was sobbing. After seeing the second of the two, Don and I were talking and analyzing the films, as we were wont to do. I asked him which movie made him cry more.
I'll be honest. I knew the answer to the question. FotB was all about the oldest daughter and her dad coping with her growing up, moving away and making her own life. I knew this was a trigger for Don, and waited smugly for him to answer. Interestingly, he needed to think about it. For a few minutes. "Hook." he said. I was gobsmacked! WTF? Did he not picture me haring off to marry someone who might take his place in my life? Where was the love? (I've always been a tad dramatic.)
He smiled sadly and explained why he cried more for the Pan.
"I see me in Peter." he said. "When he shows up to the baseball field after the game is over because he's been stuck in a meeting, I saw me. I felt like I had missed so much of your childhood experiences. It made me regret."
My indignation melted away. And then rushed right back...more righteous than ever. I remember looking at him incredulously, shaking my head and admonishing him for ever thinking he missed anything of any importance. In my memory, every play I was in, every recital I performed in, every volleyball game I played in, my dad was there. Any time I looked out into the audience I saw Don. I couldn't think of a thing he wasn't there for. But my perception and his were very different. I like to think I convinced him to agree with mine.
And therein lies the rub. The movies and tv shows put these concepts of the perfect dad out there. From Father knows Best to black-ish to Despicable Me's Felonius Gru to Mrs Doubtfire and even Logan. In the end we see what we want to see, what makes sense to us, individually, based on our own experiences.
So, on this Father's Day, I know that I was very lucky to have Don as a dad. He wasn't perfect, but being a father isn't easy. You have a lot of pressure to live up to ideals created in history, in media and our expectations. Upside....you're not alone, fathers of the world. You should commiserate with each other. Grab a beer, pull up a chair and watch FoodTV (you know you want to). And while you may not get the kudos that moms do...or the respect that moms do, in the present, we kids....in the end...remember the role you played, and love you for it.
